Victim Impact Statement Example for Domestic Violence

This is an example of a victim impact statement for domestic violence, covering both physical violence and coercive control. It is fictional. The name, the people, and the details are invented. It is written in plain words, in one survivor's voice, so you can see how a statement like this can read.

This one is written by someone who is angry, and who has every reason to be. Her partner was violent, and because of that violence, child protection came to her door and asked whether her children were safe with her. She is the one who kept them safe. That kind of injustice is real, and so is the anger it leaves behind.

If you are writing your own, there is no right way for it to sound. Yours should sound like you, whatever you are feeling. For a step by step walkthrough, see our guide on how to write a victim impact statement. If you would like a hand, Justice Draft's free guided questions take you through it one part at a time.

The headings below are the same ones used in the Justice Draft tool.

How I felt at the time

For a long time I was scared all the time. I watched his face to know what kind of night it was going to be. I kept the kids quiet so he would not get set off. I told myself it was not that bad. I told myself a lot of things that were not true. I was so busy keeping everyone safe that I did not have room to feel angry. The anger came later.

Emotional wellbeing

I do not sleep right. I get angry fast now, and then I feel bad about it, because that is not who I am. I cry in the car where the kids can't; see. For years he told me I was useless and that no one else would ever want me. I believed him. I am only now starting to see that none of it was true. Some days I am proud of how far I have come. Other days I am just tired, and angry that I had to come this far at all.

Relationships

He cut me off from everyone, slowly, so I didn't notice it happening. I didn't speak to my mum or sisters for two years because he made it too hard. My friends stopped calling because I always had to say no. By the end it was just him and me and the kids, which is exactly how he wanted it. I am building those bridges back now. Me and mum are okay again. Some of the relationships can't be fixed. Those were my people, and he took them from me.

Physical health

He put his hands on me more times than I can count. Now, I flinch when someone moves too fast near me. I have pain in my shoulder that never properly went away. I went years without proper sleep, and my body is still tired and catching up.

Financial impact

He controlled all the money. I had to ask him for everything, even for things the kids needed. He put bills in my name that I am still paying off and some loans that gave me bad credit. When I left, I had nothing. I have started again from zero, with two kids, and it's hard. But every dollar I earn now is mine, and I am the one who decides what happens to it. That feels good, even in the weeks when money is tight.

Daily life and routine

I lived by his rules. What I cooked. What I wore. Who I was allowed to text. If I got it wrong, there was a price to pay. I planned my whole day around his moods. Now no one tells me what to do in my own house, and I am still getting used to how that feels. Some mornings I wake up and remember he is not here, and I can finally breathe.

Sense of safety

I did not feel safe in my own home for years. The place that was meant to be safe was the scariest place I knew. My kids saw things they should never have seen. My youngest used to go quiet and hide in her room when his voice got loud. A child should not have to learn that. Then child protection got involved because of his violence, and I had people in my home asking if my kids were safe with me. I have never once let my kids be unsafe. He is the reason they were in danger. But I was the one answering the questions. I was terrified they would take my kids off me. No one should have to be that scared of losing their children because of something someone else did.

Spiritual and cultural wellbeing

I am not a religious person. But I used to know who I was. I knew where I stood and what I believed in. He chipped away at that until there was not much left. I am putting myself back together now, mostly for my kids, so they grow up knowing what a strong mum looks like.

Who I was before this happened

Before him I was strong. I stood up for myself. I had a job I liked and friends who knew they could count on me. I was a good mum, and I knew it. I lost a lot of that, and for a while I forgot she ever existed. She is coming back now. She is sadder and more tired than she used to be, but she is still me.

What I want the court or assessor to know

I am angry, and I think I have earned the right to be. I spent years being careful and quiet and frightened in my own home. I protected my kids through every bit of it, and I still got treated like I was the one who had done something wrong. I am not the problem. I never was. My kids and I are still standing, and that is not thanks to him. It is in spite of him. He took a lot from us. He does not get to take the rest. That is all I want to say.